28 Jun Did Suarez Have The Munchies?

Need A Toothpick Luis?

,p>Need A Toothpick Luis?

With the Uruguayan team being the only outfit legally allowed to consume cannabis in their home country, experts fear further outbreaks of biting are highly likely.

Luis Suarez was sent home from the World Cup earlier this week, when he bit Italian defender Giorgio Chiellini in what some commentators described as a cannabis-induced moment of psychosis.

Uruguay recently became the first country in the world to legalise cannabis. In line with predictions, the country has descended into a state of stupified frenzy, which experts insist is due to the recent change in law, not to the daily screening of World Cup football.

FIFA spokesman for health and sponsorship, Dougle Standard says “it is long known that cannabis use leads to outbreaks of unspeakable violence, and this incident shows that biting must now be added to the list of possible cannabis-related injuries. Whether the act was due to an attack of psychosis or because of the ‘munchies effect’ has not yet been clarified. Further research is required”

It has been alleged that the Urguayan team have been using cannabis to gain an unfair advantage over its rivals, using it to speed up recovery times, treat muscle spasms and increase team spirit through a game called ‘Take A Hit And Pass It On’.

Uruguayan team officials, however, dismissed such claims and pointed out that Luis Suarez has form in biting rival players, with the last such incident happening before the change in the law.

Taking a swig from his Heineken, Dougle Standard retorted he did not remember these prior incidents ever having taken place.

By Special World Cup Correspondent Clark Clear